Natalia Shatirishvili and Giorgi Balakhashvili, both in their mid-30s, shared the days of their parental leave twice, when they had their two children.

“I knew that under the national legislation both parents are entitled to six months of parental leave and we took advantage of it,” says Natalia, who works for a non-governmental organization, is involved in many projects, and realized that she could not spend the six months at home with her child. “Therefore, Giorgi himself was the one who suggested taking [the paternity leave].”

Giorgi works at the National Bank of Georgia, and, 8 years ago, when he had his first child and decided to share the parental leave with Natalia, he received a lot of support from his workplace. Giorgi attended the birth of both of his children and was actively involved in the processes of childcare from the very beginning.

“I had not heard of a similar case before, I did not make this decision based on someone else's example, I wanted it myself. Since then, I talked to almost anyone who had a similar desire, and I realized that it is contagious and sharing experience is important,” says Giorgi, who advises all fathers to take advantage of this opportunity.

Natalia believes that it is important for parents to share responsibility for their children from the very beginning. According to her, a special bond is formed between mothers and children even before babies are born, but fathers need to attend the childbirth, take paternity leave and participate in the process of childcare for these bonds to be formed. 

“New-borns benefit from having besides them someone close to them, but it is also critically important for fathers themselves. When they are all alone with their new-borns and they have to feed, change and comfort them - they take more responsibility and at the same time form the kind of bond [with their children] that will last for the rest of their lives,” says Natalia.

Giorgi adds that not only children learn many things from their fathers, but fathers also learn a lot through their relationship with their children.

“You get used to things that you may not have thought about before. You become more patient; you tend to plan everything. In fact, relationship with your child, and specifically paternity leave, makes you a better person,” says Giorgi and advices new fathers: “Hug your children tightly, because you won't have a chance to experience a similar emotion later.”

Natalia and Giorgi are still equally involved in the lives of their children - 8-year-old Ilia and 4-year-old Mate, and they share the responsibility for taking care of them: one takes the older child to school, the other takes the younger one to nursery school, or vice versa. The couple also share household chores equally, such as cooking, washing up, etc., thus setting a kind of example for their children on how to live in an environment free of gender roles.

In 2013, the survey “Men and Gender Relations in Georgia” conducted by the United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA) revealed the need to work equally with women and men to change harmful social norms deeply rooted in society. The 2019 study “Men, Women and Gender Relations in Georgia: Public Perceptions and Attitudes” clearly showed that deep-rooted social norms about the roles of women and men have gradually begun to change. 

For example, since 2013, the proportion of both men and women who agreed that caregiving tasks are the mother’s responsibility declined substantially, from 81 percent to 69 percent for men, and from 76 percent to 54 percent for women. In addition, back in 2013, 1 in 2 respondents believed a law guaranteeing leave for new fathers was not necessary, and nearly the same proportion did not support the idea of employers being mandated to provide parental leave for fathers; whereas in 2019 both women and men (67.3% and 64.6%, respectively) supported the adoption of the law, guaranteeing shared parental leave.

According to Natalia, a lot has changed in Georgia over the last decades, many stereotypes have disappeared, and in her opinion, in this regard, the situation is going to improve further over the next decade. 

“It actually made the news when Giorgi took paternity leave when Ilia was born, TV channels covered it - he became a real star, and when he took paternity leave when Mate was born - no one contacted us. We see that, little by little, other fathers also tend to take paternity leave. Gradually, this has become a common practice, there are quite a few couples, who take advantage of this opportunity and there will probably be many more,” says Natalia.

47-year-old Ia Gabunia thinks that father's involvement in childcare is absolutely natural: “Well, how could it be otherwise?” - she asks.
 

Ia and her husband, Giorgi Bujiashvili, have three children - 17-year-old Sandro, 11-year-old Nikolo and 8-year-old Ano. Giorgi did not have to take parental leave, because when he had his children, he was mostly self-employed or had his own business, but he was fully involved in childcare from the very beginning.

“Ano is lucky to have us as parents, as we were already really experienced in this regard. When Sandro was born, because he was our first child, we used to learn from each other, from others, from our mistakes, but then Nikolo was born, we did better in this regard,” says Giorgi about the transformation they underwent as parents from the moment they had their first child – Sandro, to the moment they had their youngest one - Ano.

A few months after Sandro was born, Ia had to go on a business trip and leave her son for a few days, but she was not worried, because Giorgi was to take care of the child in her absence.

“I think it's the time, and the most precious time, for both mothers and fathers to fully realize what's happening to them when their baby is born,” Ia says, adding that it's important for parents to go through this process together.

According to her, Giorgi has always been a role model for the people around them and turned out to be the best “role model”. However, she also hopes that gradually equal parenting will become a common practice.

“Wherever we go, we enjoy people’s attention. Maybe because we are a large and quite noisy family, but it just happens so that Giorgi is actively engaged in whatever our children are doing, and not only our children, but also their friends. Everyone tends to gather around him and everyone notes how well he gets on with children and what a special father he is,” says Ia

As a result of amendments to the Labour Code of Georgia, made in 2020, with the involvement of UNFPA, a provision appeared in the Code, according to which an employee shall, upon her/his request, be granted leave for childcare, which the child's mother or father can use in whole or in part. In particular: “Enjoyment of maternity leave as provided for by paragraph 1 of this article is an exclusive right of the mother of the child, although the father of the child has a right to enjoy the days of said leave which have not been used by the mother of the child.” As for the leave due to childcare, it amounts to 604 days, of which 57 calendar days of the leave shall be paid.

The benefits of positive involvement of both parents in the care and upbringing of their children have been proven by multiple studies – this has a positive impact on children’s physical and mental health, their academic achievements, children develop better social skills, higher self-esteem, and display fewer behavioural problems and increased resilience to stress. 

“The fact that nowadays, in Georgia, fathers can take advantage of parental leave reflects the sentiments of society, especially that of young people, regarding the distribution of care work. So far, we do not have data on the level of awareness of this right among young fathers or on the number of fathers who have taken advantage of this opportunity since the law came into force. However, within the framework of the programme “EU 4 Gender Equality: Together Against Gender Stereotypes and Gender-Based Violence”, we plan to monitor this trend and identify areas of improvement, where additional effort is required,” says Etuna Noghaideli, Project Officer of the United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA). 

According to her, “Paternity leave is part of a broader idea of what we call gender-responsive family policies - policies that facilitate work-life balance.”
 

“Certainly, an important prerequisite is to have the issue of maternal, paternal and parental leave properly regulated by the law, but individual courage and determination are also important. In relation to any such issue, equality should first be seen as a right. However, we should also consider its implementation as our responsibility: courage is essential, and sometimes we may even have to give up personal comfort and privileges, but we have to realize that this is a common good that will definitely bring us positive outcomes,” says Etuna Noghaideli.

Evidence shows that the development and implementation of gender-responsive family policies can change discriminatory gender norms and redistribute unpaid care work so that women and men are able to pursue their career as well as reproductive aspirations. 

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This web story is being produced in the framework of the “EU 4 Gender Equality: Together against gender stereotypes and gender-based violence" programme, funded by the European Union, implemented jointly by UN Women and UNFPA. Its contents are the sole responsibility of UNFPA Georgia and do not necessarily reflect the views of the European Union.